Summary and my refection on INNER CHILD COMMUNICATION
What
inner child? Who is he/she? Inner child is a metaphor of our adults’
sub-personality that still stays in childhood, housing child-like and
adolescent behavior, memories, emotions, habits, attitudes and thought
patterns.
On
the positive side, inner child is parts of our adults’ beauty - creative, curious, adventurous,
imaginative and daring to try, learn and discover new things, optimistic,
innocent, and cheerful. They know how to have spontaneous fun, and are relatively
free of guilt and anxiety.
Unfortunately, with age increasing, our child-like capacity for innocence, wonder, creativity,
audacity, awe, joy, sensitivity
and playfulness are blurred or even killed. This reminds me how to be a good
parent - How could nurture our kids to stay in such positive capacity when they
grow into adult? As this will definitely affect their quality of life and happiness.
If an adult has lost part of their inner beauty, it is never too late to reclaim
their childhood joy and recreate their potential to be creative and
adventurous. I am sure if we want to be happier in the rest of our life, we
need to communicate with our inner child, especially to learn from their
infinite imagination power and fearless spirit.
On the negative side, inner child tends to be autonomous (self-directed), their own needs, desires, issues and goals are in first priority. This might lead to rather destructive behavior -impetuous, impulsive quality of childish petulance (moodiness)
or narcissistic (egoistic)
temper tantrums.
Or an infantile
neediness, dependency, and dread of abandonment.
Or an irresponsibility
and angry refusal to be an adult.
Unhappy childhood is the rooted cause for the twisted personality:
·
The Abandoned childhood
·
The Neglected childhood
·
The Spoiled childhood
·
The Fearful Childhood
·
The Disconnected
·
The Discounted Childhood
A maure personality of adults understand that the past traumas, sadness, disappointments and
depression cannot be changed and must be accepted. Those days are over. What was done cannot be undone. We should
not as adults now expect others to meet all of these unfulfilled childhood
needs. They cannot. Authentic/reliable
adulthood requires both accepting the painful
past and the primary responsibility for taking care of that inner child's
needs, for being a "good enough" parent to him or her now--and in the
future.
As a responsible adult and continuous growing up adult, they can
bear character of acknowledging,
accepting, and taking responsibility for loving and parenting one's own inner child.
Holding our accumulated childhood hurts, traumas, fears and angers is like carrying emotional baggage, how well is the
quality of life is able to be expected?
Obviously, our quality of life is our quality of communication
with our inner child. The more we love ourselves, the better we communicate
with our inner child. To learn how to communicate with our inner child is a
life long learning.
By initiating and
maintaining an ongoing dialogue between the two, a reconciliation between inner
child and mature adult can be reached. A new, mutually beneficial, cooperative,
symbiotic relationship can be created in which the sometimes conflicting needs
of both the adult self and inner child can be creatively satisfied.
3-9-2013
No comments:
Post a Comment